Leaning on each other…Madonna House and St. Elizabeth Lodge emphasizes community as a building block to success

"We are always coming up with interesting ways to get our population of residents involved. They are learning from coursework and groups. They are cooking together in the kitchen. But, most importantly, they are learning by just gathering together and learning how to be a loving and supportive community to each other.”

Statistics show that 40% of single mother households live in poverty. Others struggle more with relationships, addiction, or just lack the skills to succeed on their own. Catholic Charities of Eastern Oklahoma’s Transitional Living programs, Madonna House and St. Elizabeth Lodge, are just two examples of resources available to pregnant women and single mothers to help them improve their circumstances and work toward independence.

One advantage to programs like Madonna House and St. Elizabeth Lodge is the ability to get to know other women in similar situations, growing together and leaning on each other for support. For this reason, Catholic Charities is careful to select residents who want to follow the recommendations of the staff and truly engage in the program. This results in a community of women with similar goals who help each other out and learn from those around them.

Many women come to Madonna House lost and scared. Pregnant and often alone, the women need a safe place to land, where they know they are loved and that their babies will have a chance at a happy future. It is a home for healing on many different levels - a place for women to identify with others, to find comfort in safety, and to become healthy in mind, body and spirit.

For many of these women, choosing life and having a newborn in uncertain times is draining in every way. With coaching from Catholic Charities staff, many are encouraged to get an education to better their career options, they mend relationships that are vital to a successful future, and they learn skills that will take them past their time at Madonna House – like cooking nutritious meals!

Madonna House residents say their favorite night of the week is when volunteer, Mirella Sehl, shows up to cook with them. Aside from a break during Covid, Mirella has been volunteering to cook with the ladies once a week for the past seven years! And when Mirella is in the Madonna House kitchen, it feels like a holiday. Surrounded by the delicious aroma in the air, the residents gather with little ones in tow, cutting vegetables and stirring sauces, but also telling stories and laughing.

Prior to “cooking night”, important lessons in organization and planning are taught, too. First, the residents decide whose week it is to pick the menu. One particular week, Brandi decided the menu will be a taco bar. Next, a thorough grocery list is made, which includes the freshest and healthiest ingredients. Then it’s time to shop. Most of the shopping is done quite conveniently on campus at The Market at Catholic Charities. Here, the food is fresh and free of charge. The best part is that her baby boy, Kaiden, also gets to enjoy the experience in a safe and secure setting.

Mirella says her goal is to teach the ladies how to prepare their favorite dishes in a heart healthy way. “There is something magical that happens to the soul when everyone is gathered in the kitchen preparing a meal and dining together,” she explained. The women, the newborns and the unborn babies are all safe and thriving. Mirella is teaching them not just how to cook and be healthy, but most importantly how to be happy and feel loved.

St. Elizabeth Lodge is different from Madonna House in that it houses mothers with older children and/or multiple children. Each family occupies their own apartment, complete with a full kitchen and bathroom. The beautiful part of the two homes being connected is that the two groups of residents often come together to create a big, diverse community. There are numerous classes and activities that include residents of both homes. One night of each week, the residents attend a Moral Reasoning & Pursuit of Happiness class. On another evening is bible study, where the mothers get to learn in a relaxed environment, as the little ones are watched by loving and qualified volunteers. The babies go to the nursery and the older children gather in the playroom where they are taught dance and physical movement by Oklahoma Performing Arts, a nonprofit organization that teaches classical arts education to children ages 3 to 19. From time to time, volunteers and local parishes provide special opportunities for the mothers and their children, like cookouts, Trunk or Treats and Christmas parties.

“We are always coming up with interesting ways to get our population of residents involved,” says Veronika Swiney, Manager of Transitional Living at Catholic Charities. “They are learning from coursework and groups. They are cooking together in the kitchen. But, most importantly, they are learning by just gathering together and learning how to be a loving and supportive community to each other.”

To learn more about Catholic Charities Transitional Living programs, visit cceok.org.